Q: Tell us about the important people in your life.
My husband and our two beautiful children. Also, my sister, her family, and my handful of friends. I don’t have a gazillion friends, but I love my small group and we’re pretty close. We’re always together and it’s easy to stay connected. Q: Where are you from and where do you live now? I now live in Austin, but my family immigrated from Vietnam in 1979/1980. We first lived in Worcester, Massachusetts and moved between Houston and Worcester a couple of times. From Houston, I moved to Austin to attend the University of Texas and traveled a bit, but ultimately came back to Austin, changed careers and went back to school. Q: What does community mean to you? I guess in short caring. I think a community includes family, friends, neighbors, and even people you don’t know well in the neighborhood, but every now and then we catch up. Even though we’re not close, I think we’re always there for each other - to watch out for each other’s home and kids. And if someone needs something, we’re there to help. Q: What’s something you’re most proud of? This is a tough question because I'm very hard on myself. So, I do think I am most proud of just being able to be where I am today with very little assistance. My family worked very hard, but as far as parenting and guiding me and showing me, they didn’t have an education, so they didn’t know how to educate me on how to navigate applying to college and such. Coming from a different country, my parents had very different points of view. I was much more Americanized than them, so I guess I’m also proud of the fact that I was able to let go of what they felt I should do with my life and really kind of do my own thing. To their disapproval, I had to let go of what they felt was right for me based on our culture, and I had to do what I felt was right for me here in the United States. I had to learn how to let go of that part of your family that isn’t good for you in the long run and make it on my own. Q: Where do you find inspiration, motivation, and encouragement? I read a lot of self-help books and look to other women who inspire different parts of me. I feel like not every one person can embody everything you want to be, but every person you meet, has a very special part of them that you might want to pull from to improve yourself. I have a motivator for fitness and health and then someone else who motivates me for the side of my brain interested in politics and history. Q: What’s one thing about motherhood that has surprised you? Hmm. I’d have to say the bipolarity of madness and love. Like, OMG are you insane? I love them to death and then also want to kill them. And like people say, it’s true, though - the days are long, but the years are short. Q: What’s one thing you want to accomplish over the next year? In this new year, I look forward to a change in career so I can spend more time with my kids. For the past decade I’ve been in medicine, but my schedule keeps me busy on nights and weekends. I’m working to learn new skills and would like to launch into the med spa business, so I’m looking into a different field of medicine. I feel with my current schedule, I’m missing half their lives. They grow so fast. And they need me. I just feel like I need to have more time with them because, you know, you can always make more money, but you can't take that time back, you know, and I need to be there for them. Q: What are you looking forward to gaining from a community of peers? Like we talked about earlier, just meeting everyone with different talents and different mindsets. Everyone has value and can contribute to make others better. I think everybody has something to contribute whether they feel like it or not. There are so many talented people out there that don’t realize they’re talented. Just sharing our skills and knowledge, what we’re good at and what we’re interested in; it can spark something for you.
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Q: Tell us about the important people in your life.
My daughter is 26 and my granddaughter just turned 4. My husband and I have been together for 9 years. He's my second husband. My first husband was a police officer and unfortunately extremely abusive - physically, mentally, and emotionally. All of that, which probably pushed me in the direction of counseling, honestly. My daughter and granddaughter are moving in with us next month, as she doesn’t have a lot of family support there. You know, “it takes a village”. Q: Where are you from and where do you live now? I grew up in lower, Southern Wisconsin, in a very small rural community and left as soon as I graduated from high school. I returned to Wisconsin around 2005. Q: What does community mean to you? Personally, I think about the community where I live and how I can give back or contribute, which has been even more important given recent political discord. In my community, I am in the minority, as far as political affiliation. Within my professional community, I have colleagues who support one another in many ways. As a therapist, I am always looking for new ways to use my skills to help others. I have facilitated support groups for veterans and groups for family members and children of narcotics users because there are no such supports like that in this area. I’m happy to be part of the MWP Community because I also hope to offer my skills to support women, mothers. Q: What’s something you’re most proud of? Beyond being a mother and being proud of my daughter and granddaughter, if it’s really more about me, I’m most proud of the idea that the person that you meet in a counseling session, as your counselor, is the same person. Being a therapist for me isn’t about putting on some mask to engage with clients. And I think I'm the most proud of that because people need to be able to feel comfortable and not judged, and not looked down upon. I think the best compliment I get and I'm grateful that I hear often is, “this was such an easy first appointment.” And so, I think for me, I'm the most proud of the practice of staying genuine to who I am without apology. Q: Where do you find inspiration, motivation, and encouragement? First of all, I see my own counselor and she's amazing. Also, my husband is my best friend on the face of the planet. He is my rock. He is my safe place. I also have a small, but amazing tribe of women. And although I’m not religious, I am spiritual. I do believe everything in life happens the way it's supposed to. And finally, I swear by working out. I don’t care if I lose weight, it just makes my day go better. It reduces my anxiety and I sleep better. Self-care is top notch on my radar. If I don’t focus on self-care, I can’t do my job. Q: What’s one thing about motherhood that has surprised you? Mothering an adult child was the hardest transition and the biggest struggle. We always hear about the terrible twos and the middle school years, but once they’re an adult, you really do lose all your parental power, so you have to learn to parent differently. I had to learn patience and grace. Sometimes, I had to learn to keep my mouth shut. It’s not easy to let your adult child fail because they won’t listen or they want to prove you wrong. Parenting an adult child can feel like we’ve lost value as mothers because they’re not as dependent on us, but in reality they do still need us. They just need us differently. Q: What’s one thing you want to accomplish over the next year? At 45 years old and where I'm at right now, this might be the first time I would ever answer this question this way - nothing. I just want to be present in my life. Sometimes I feel our American culture is always about striving for the next goal or the accomplishment, and we rarely just say we've made it. I want to enjoy that I’m exactly where I need to be. Q: What are you looking forward to gaining from a community of peers? My hope is this community will be a safe space where women are “lifting up each other’s crown”. Through our stories and experiences, by being real, honest, sometimes vulnerable, we are normalizing the struggles. Social media platforms are not safe spaces to engage authentically. Personally, I don’t feel social media is a safe space where I will not be judged. I’m looking forward to connecting with other women and supporting mothers no matter what stage of motherhood. Community is so important for mamas, and I remember times I didn’t have a solid community or even family to run to for support.
Q: Where are you from and where do you live now?
Before Austin, I lived in a suburb of Dallas. I was born and raised in Plano, TX and couldn’t get out fast enough. I came to the University of Texas (Austin) in 1999 to start my undergraduate in psychology liberal arts. After college, I went to California for two years, but left there following the end of a bad relationship. Q: What does community mean to you? Community is a group of people who are there for themselves, but they’re also there for each other. Community is a created family. Because even if you have family nearby, they may not be thinking of other people; they may not always have your best interest in mind. Community is made up of people who care to give as much, or more, than they take because it’s about everyone. The older I get and the crazier life seems to become, I realize a solid community is essential to personal growth. Q: What’s something you’re most proud of? I’m most proud of the fact that I always seem to land on my feet. Despite the ups and downs, I keep pushing forward. I’m proud of my resilience. Q: Where do you find inspiration, motivation, and encouragement? I’ve got a lot of self-motivation, really. I am motivated daily because I am always striving to do my best. To get up early, to get to the gym, to try a new recipe. To evaluate myself - how can I eat less meat, how can I use less plastic, how can I get better looking shoulders. All of the things. I’m really inspired by other people. I get a natural high from helping other people. The enjoyment, successes, and happiness they experience that I played some part in helping them achieve is what I love. Q: What’s one thing about motherhood that has surprised you? It sounds crazy to say it out loud, but what surprised me the most is how much time it takes and how unrewarding it can be. It makes me think how I treated my mother. I can’t remember all the things she did for me, but I imagine she gave up more than I realized. It really shocked me just how much I would have to give up, the amount of time required, even with one child. And how thankless of a role it can be. And as the child grows and changes, the phase changes again. You’ve got to constantly readjust schedules and priorities because of someone else’s needs. It’s really the time and continual giving that can be more draining than I ever realized it could be. Q: What’s one thing you want to accomplish over the next year? A year from now, I would like to be confident that I am being proactive in growing my career. Once I had a son, my career was quickly put on the back burner. I have a passion for what I do, but it’s been mostly coasting over the past few years. Now that Armin’s older, and becoming more independent, I feel I have a better sense of my time management and can better focus on my career goals and priorities. I’m really ready to start getting more career-focused. Q: What are you looking forward to gaining from a community of peers? I’m hoping to gain insight from mamas with more experience. I’m hoping to gain insight from others on how they’re handling and managing various issues with motherhood, parenting, marriage, relationships, or whatever. I want to learn what other women are doing. And, I don’t mean this to sound bad, but it’s also good to hear from others who are struggling because it lets you know you’re not alone. Because everyone does struggle. I’d also like to connect more with the larger community. I’m passionate about community issues and politics, but cannot seem to find the time for all of that. I’d love to connect with a community of women who also value those things and learn more from them. I am inspired by the mamas I know who are leaders and active in our community. |
The MWP Blog focuses on the three overarching themes of family, wellness, and community.
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